20 minutes..

Disclaimer 1: Not for the weak stomached

Disclaimer 2: This title is in no way a rip off of "tatu’s 30 minutes". An etymology has been appended below.

I’ve been constantly accused of spending more than normal time in performing my morning chores. I thought maybe it is time to put forward my side of the argument. I don’t want to die with the wordings “One who spent more time in *******” etched on my grave.

A sound bowel movement (not literally!) is good for healthy living and you shouldn’t be in a hurry go bout in doing this.  Leaving aside the umpteen positive medical facts that supports my theory; let’s see how this often frowned-upon task helps you in having a great day! What’s better than enjoying a relaxed time in the morning of the day forgetting all your worries? Many people do Yoga, meditation and much more self-forced activities. But a very few realize that there is something better than bending your body in seemingly impossible angles or just breathing heavily with your eyes closed (with haunting ‘OM’ in the background). And these elite few know how to get the best relaxation just by sitting! If you haven’t yet figured out what I’m talking about, you should read the first line again.

The implicit nature of this task is that you cannot do anything else important even if you want to. A few choose to read newspapers, which is still a bit controversial in the Indian society where anything that is made of paper is forbidden in to this room for religious reasons and that’s why we still need buckets!  (On the other hand, I wonder if Chinese had any idea that paper would be used for anything but reading and writing, when they invented it)

Anyways, it is during this activity when you can either choose to let your thoughts wander to the horizons of the universe or you can just stare at the wall in front of you. It is so good on the part of the nature for it has bestowed upon us this divine daily routine to make us relax while nature takes its natural course.  And when you finally complete the task and come out, apart from a sense of accomplishment, you not only get a free stomach, but also a free mind!

Also there is a gender bias creeping into this where men are usually thrown up the question 'what took you so long?' by our counter-gender. Hey, do we ask women the same question when we are getting ready to go out! Warning : Don't venture into our territories since we don't venture into yours!

The time that is spent on this task is worth the investment as your ROI for the day would be high as compared to having a 'constipated' mind. So, behold it as one your greatest treasure. I missed it so much when I was in college when I had to wake up at 8:25AM for the 8:30AM class and postpone most of my activities to the evening. However, currently doing my internship, I'm back to being excellent and the results are already showing in my work! Probably, my CGPA would improve if I start waking up at 8 in the morning after I return to college. I’ve taken an oath not to compromise on this task for anything.

Etymology:  It is strange how I started to referring it as ‘The 20 minutes’. My bro and I were playing cricket and my bowel was playing a different game altogether. I told my brother that I need to take a break and he asked me how long it would take. My answer was ‘20 minutes’!

P.S: A few unfortunate souls may experience difficulty during this routine, but their problems are beyond the scope of this post.

P.S2: If you haven't figured what this post is about, the following video should enlighten you.